To all newly-arrived souls in the Land of the Dead,
Buenos Dias! Please, relax and enjoy yourself. You will probably be here quite a while.
My name is Manuel Calavera, and I'm your new travel agent! I'm really looking forward to helping you cross the Land of the Dead in style. (Not to mention on a budget!) Unfortunately, you've caught me at a bad time. I'm currently out of the office for an indefinite period, due to the fact that I just quit. Well, actually, I was fired. And, to tell the truth, my boss is looking for me so that he and the boys from downtown can take me apart, bone by bone. I know it sounds bad, but I'm sure we'll all have this mess straightened out in no time, and I can get to work on your case.
All I have to do to get my job back is find a woman by the name of Mercedes Colomar, who is lost in the Petrified Forest right now. My boss says that I'm the one that got her lost, but I just met someone who feels differently. His name is Salvador Limones, and he leads an underground army called the Lost Soul's Alliance. The L.S.A. is fighting what he calls a "web of corruption in our beloved Department of Death." He believes that the Bureau of Acquisitions is cheating the very souls it was chartered to serve, and that Mercedes is their latest victim. If that's true, then maybe I don't want my old job back. There's only one way to find out: I have to travel to the Land of the Dead myself until I find her.
Of course, I have to get out of town first! I need to run some errands for Salvador, then he says he'll show me a secret tunnel out of the city. I can't go back into our offices right now, since I'm on the lam, so I'm going to have to get what I need here on the streets of El Marrow. The Day of the Dead festival is going on today, and the streets are full of slack-jawed tourists. If only I could get one of these clowns to help me...
Anyway, just sit down and have a mint and I'll be back as soon as I can. Just leaf through those pamphlets I left, and start planning your adventure. Take it from me, you're going to have a great trip!